On threats and new homes
It has been forever since my last post. Sometimes there is just way too much to say and no time to actually put it down in words. if only it would automatically transfer out of my head into this page. I've been in a relationship for almost 6 months now. Things are rocky for many different reasons. To cut a long story short, I have turned into my parents. All my life I fight their rules and their way of thinking but I have turned into a rigid, harsh, obsessive compulsive nutcase. (said with a very straight face)
I mean seriously, I had no clue I was so harsh. I reach the standards set for me so I see no point in mediocrity from others. But hey, apparently I need to deal else I'll lose my partner. Some things, I can be okay with but others, like laptops connecting with brick walls and forks on non stick pans just makes me want to scream murder. I value my things a great deal and like them to be used and kept in good condition - what is so damned wrong about that?
Right, back on track to changes in my life. I've decided to make a conscious effort to be nicer to my bloke and try and compromise on his clumsy ways :) To be honest I find his clumsiness cute, except when it involved items of value that I own! Anyways, he is the sweetest of blokes and really does love me a great deal. So why am I finding it so hard to just accept all of this and be happy. Why am I sitting on the edge, waiting for all of this to fall apart? He isn't like any of my exes, who let's face it were a series of bastards.
Ooooh more news, I just bought an apartment! Its costing me all of my savings and I'm going to be in debt for the next 30 years! I'm not sure if I'm meant to be excited about being in debt, but hey, it feels fantastic to have my own place. I'll be moving in at the end of January and will be living like a Scrooge until I manage to convince my boss to pay me more.
Right, time to head to bed and get well. This blasted flu is doing my head in. Till we meet again....
I mean seriously, I had no clue I was so harsh. I reach the standards set for me so I see no point in mediocrity from others. But hey, apparently I need to deal else I'll lose my partner. Some things, I can be okay with but others, like laptops connecting with brick walls and forks on non stick pans just makes me want to scream murder. I value my things a great deal and like them to be used and kept in good condition - what is so damned wrong about that?
Right, back on track to changes in my life. I've decided to make a conscious effort to be nicer to my bloke and try and compromise on his clumsy ways :) To be honest I find his clumsiness cute, except when it involved items of value that I own! Anyways, he is the sweetest of blokes and really does love me a great deal. So why am I finding it so hard to just accept all of this and be happy. Why am I sitting on the edge, waiting for all of this to fall apart? He isn't like any of my exes, who let's face it were a series of bastards.
Ooooh more news, I just bought an apartment! Its costing me all of my savings and I'm going to be in debt for the next 30 years! I'm not sure if I'm meant to be excited about being in debt, but hey, it feels fantastic to have my own place. I'll be moving in at the end of January and will be living like a Scrooge until I manage to convince my boss to pay me more.
Right, time to head to bed and get well. This blasted flu is doing my head in. Till we meet again....
posted by disorientated at 3:59 PM
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